Sunday, December 27, 2009

MOVIE REVIEW HAIKUS: It's Complicated






























Merryl Streep must think
She's in "Mamma Mia!" still
She's such a phony

Alec Baldwin fails
To save this train wreck movie
Wait for DVD

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Rizzo On My Phone!!!

Earlier this year I decided to get a new cellphone. My old Sprint phone was a phone. I could also play "Snake II" on it. No texting. No camera. No interwebs. No MP3 player. Zilch! Make calls. Take calls. Play "Snake."

I was thinking about jumping on the iPhone bandwagon but a couple of friends had G1 phones [the first Android phone] and raved about them. After doing some pretty extensive research comparing the pros and cons of each phone I decided to go with a G1. Unlike iPhone adoptees I don't have to buy a new phone to get expanded memory. I just have to switch out memory cards. And hey...I can remove the battery from my phone if need be. iPhone users can't do that without violating warranties. Plus, I'm a total geek for anything Google.

Of course the G1 had its share of cons. With it being the only Android phone quality apps were few and far between. But as Android phones have become available via other carriers the market seems to be getting better. The recent introduction of Verizon's Droid phone seems to have made a giant leap in making Android a contender to overthrow the iPhone's cellphone reign. And I feel pretty confident in saying that because of what I found today.

For the past couple of months WKNR has been running ads for an iPhone app that streams select ESPN Radio stations to the iPhone [this has to due with stations using Flash-based streaming versus MP3-based streaming...I'll spare you further technobabble]. Sadly they haven't been advertising a similar app for Android phones. And they still aren't...even though today I found the same app in the Android Market.

It cost $2.99 for the app [a bargain!] but now I no longer have to be sitting at a computer to listen to The Really Big Show with Tony Rizzo! It's good to be alive!!!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

BREAKING NEWS: Rizz reads my email on-air

Tony Rizzo opened today's edition of "The Really Big Show" by announcing that he had five sources confirming that Mike Holmgren had dinner last night in Cleveland with top men from the Cleveland Browns. My commentary:
Hey Rizz...my sources have confirmed that it was NOT Mike Holmgren. Four of my five sources confirm that it was Wilford Brimley discussing die-uh-beet-us. The fifth source says it was Chumley from Tennessee Tuxedo.



It's difficult to speculate as to exactly WHO was at dinner with Browns top men last night. But one thing is certain: A change is coming soon!!!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

BROWNS BEAT THE STEELERS!!!

HOLY HELL! IT FINALLY HAPPENED!

AND I WAS THERE!!!


[view from my seat]


[freezing!]



Wednesday, December 9, 2009

BREAKING NEWS: Rizz reads my email on-air [and references another]

There was a discussion on Rizzo's show about who's responsible for the Cleveland Cavaliers six losses [they had only lost three games by this point last season]. Aaron Goldhammer said it's Cavaliers coach Mike Brown's fault while Rizzo thinks it's LeBron James's fault. Their back-and-forth inspired the following email:
Hey Rizz...Who's responsible when Aaron brings the show to a screeching halt with his endless yapping? The program director? [Oh yeah, that's Hammer]
Rizzo also referenced an email I sent during an earlier part of the show in which they were discussing how cold it is in Cleveland. It's actually colder in Dallas right now [though that will likely not be the case later today].
Hey Rizz...It's in the mid-20s down here in the Dallas/Fort Worth metromess. I hope whatever snow storm you're expecting up there holds up till tomorrow afternoon because I'm flying up in the morning to sit in the Dawg Pound and watch the Browns beat the Steelers!!!

Survey Wednesday Responses:
  • Hot Key 2 should be replaced with "Over? Did you say 'over'? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!!!" [from National Lampoon's Animal House]
  • Laughing with Modell: I think the email from earlier hit it on the head with Juan Gonzalez
  • My porn name: Randall Avery. Sounds classy huh? It's like I'm so classy I hold my pinky finger up while I do it.
I'm looking forward to being back in Cleveland. It's good to be alive!!!

Sadly, no mention was made of my porn name [you can figure yours out using the following formula: Middle Name + Name of Street You Grew Up On = PORN NAME].

I'm still feeling sick. I hope I make it through tomorrow's game.

Friday, November 13, 2009

It Is Now Safe To Return To The Angelika

At last! The day has finally arrived! Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire opens in Dallas. I have no interest in seeing this preposterously named film. I'm thrilled that I will no longer be unwillingly subjected to the trailer each time I attend a film at the Dallas Angelika. Seriously, if they had posted a sign at the ticket office along the lines of "Screenings of A Serious Man will be preceded by the Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire trailer I would have passed on seeing the Coen brothers lastest film.

One thing I did learn from seeing the trailer several times is that Mo'Nique looks an awful lot like Tracy Morgan in Episode 3.2 of 30 Rock - "Believe In The Stars." That episode featured Morgan's Tracy Jordan getting into a feud with Jane Krakowski's Jenna Maroney over whose life is harder: women or black men. Tracy "disguises" himself as a white woman in an effort to prove his point. Perhaps I'm crazy. Judge for yourself:


Sunday, November 1, 2009

MOVIE REVIEW HAIKU: A Serious Man






























This truly is the
Most Jewish movie ever
More so than Yentl

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

BREAKING NEWS: Rizz reads my email on-air

It's been awhile. That's mostly due to my waking up later so I've been missing the show. WKNR let Josh Sabo go last week which I'm quite pissed about. Josh was the perfect balance to Aaron "Hammer" Goldhammer's whiny rants.

Apparently Hammer ate some bad food yesterday and has food poisoning. Because of this he is not on Rizzo's show today. This development inspired me to write the following email:
Dear Rizz...It's official. "Hammer-Free Tuesdays" is a hit! Who would have thought you could top "Survey Wednesdays" or "Cold Call Dump Button Thursdays"? Not me. But I sure am glad you did. It's good to be alive!!!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

WAKE YO DEAD ASS UP!



A friend of mine is really into zombies. So much that she's started up a nifty little website: dallaszombiecrawl.com.

This should be a blast...AND it's for a couple of worthwhile causes. It's a Sunday in October. The weather should be perfect. Football will for the most part be over for the day. And it's like Halloween a week early. This is going to be so full of win. Make sure to show up so you're not full of fail!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

CHICKEN SWITCH - One Month to Go


On September 29, 2009 my all-time favorite band - The Melvins - will be releasing a remix album entitled Chicken Switch. Remixes have been around for decades but are generally just an extended version of a popular song chopped and edited by other musicians and DJs. The Melvins however are doing something entirely different. They are presenting their remixers with an entire album to play with. Here's the lowdown from the band's website:

The Melvins will release Chicken Switch, the long rumored(since 2003) remix cd with a twist, on Sept. 29 via Ipecac Recordings. Unlike usual remix cds where the remixer is given a single track to work with, for Chicken Switch each remixer was given a full album to work with and pull from to create their track (and in some cases, more than one full album was used as source material). The song names were also newly selected by their remixer.


Tracklisting:
  1. Eye Yamatsuka — Washmachine Sk8tronics
  2. Christoph Heemann — Emperor Twaddle Remix
  3. V/VM — She Chokes Her Dying Breath and Does It In My Face
  4. John Duncan — AAHHH…
  5. Matmos — Linksh√§nder
  6. Lee Ranaldo — EggNog Trilogy: i) She’s Ivanhoe ii) Cancer iii) Inebriated
  7. Merzbow — SNOW REM REM IBVZ
  8. David Scott Stone — Prick Concr√®te/Revolution M
  9. Panacea — Queen (Electroclash Remix)
  10. Sunroof! — The Silky Apple Butter of Youth
  11. Kawabata Makoto — 4th Floor Hellcopter
  12. Farmersmanual — disp_tx_skel_mach_murx
  13. Void Manes — Overgoat
  14. RLW — Over from Under the Dog, Girl & Boy Treatment
  15. Speedranch — Hard Revenge Milly Bloody Battle VS. The Melvins Ozmatized Gore Police (Feat: Cardopusher of the Five Deadly Venoms)

Friday, August 28, 2009

Gettin' Down with The Melvins

The Melvins rolled through town Wednesday night and brought a heapin' helpin' of RAWK with them. They've been one of the opening acts on Down's current tour. Down has a knack for taking several nights off during the week so this has given The Melvins the opportunity to do some headlining shows along the way. Attendees of Down shows are being treated to a solid 45-minute Melvins set. But those catching one of The Melvins headlining shows are getting treated to a bonus second set [that's actually the first set]. Overall the two sets leaned more heavily towards older faves than the last couple of tours have [excepting the 25th anniversary tour a few months back].

The first set [the bonus set] started out with just Buzz and Dale onstage ripping through "The Ballad of Dwight Fry." After about 20 minutes Coady and Jared joined them onstage and together they player for about another half hour. They ended by playing about half of "Dies Iraea" before whispering "To be continued" and leaving the stage. After a twenty minute intermission the band returned and finished "Dies Iraea." Check out the previous post for a photo of the setlist for the second set.

Overall this was the best Melvins show I've seen in some time. It certainly ranks up there with the "three set" tour they did in 1996 and the set they ripped through when they were opening for Tool in 1998. This was the kind of show that reminded you why you love this band so much.























Thursday, August 27, 2009

SETLIST: Melvins @ House of Blues Cambridge Room

I just got in from tonight's Melvins show. Pics will be up in the next couple of days. In the meantime, here's a photo of the setlist for the second set they played.

NOTES: "DNA" was a cover of Devo's "Mr. DNA." They performed an a capella cover of Merle Haggard's "Okie From Muskogie" after "The Bit."

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Holy Hell...Marduk is Returning to The States!



Legendary black metal band Marduk had planned on trekking across our shores several months ago with Mayhem. After three shows the band dropped off the bill. This ultimately led to the slow unraveling of the remainder of Mayhem's tour as the other supporting acts withdrew from the tour for various reasons. Trust me, the whole thing's one big soap opera with a lot of finger pointing and blaming to be shared all around.

So color me surprised when I stumbled upon this little press release from the Marduk camp:

Following three very special US appearances earlier this month in Baltimore, Philadelphia and New York (effectively breaking their streak of visa issues), Swedish black metal battalion Marduk will return for a full North American headlining tour this November. The band will be joined by Nachtmystium, Mantic Ritual, Merrimack and Black Anvil (on select dates).

Dubbed "
US Plague Tour 2009", the trek will kick off on November 20th at the Palladium in Worcester, MA and run through 21 more dates before coming to a close in New York City on December 16th at the Gramercy Theater, where the band recently played to an overwhelming crowd response.


"US Plague Tour 2009" announced dates are as follows:

Nov. 20 - Worcester, MA - The Palladium (w/ Black Anvil)
Nov. 21 - Montreal, QC - Les Foufounes Electriques(w/ Black Anvil)
Nov. 22 - Toronto, ON - Wreck Room (w/ Black Anvil)
Nov. 23 - Baltimore, MD - Sonar
Nov. 24 - Atlanta, GA - The Masquerade
Nov. 25 - Tampa, FL - Brass Mug
Nov. 28 - Austin, TX - Red 7
Nov. 29 - Ft Worth, TX - Ridglea Theater
Nov. 30 - Tulsa, OK - The Marquee
Dec. 02 - Albuquerque, NM - Launchpad
Dec. 03 - Tempe, AZ - The Sets
Dec. 04 - Hollywood, CA - The Key Club
Dec. 05 - San Marcos, CA - The Jumping Turtle
Dec. 06 - San Francisco, CA - DNA Lounge
Dec. 07 - Portland, OR - Satyricon
Dec. 08 - Seattle, WA - Studio Seven
Dec. 10 - Denver, CO - Cervantes Masterpiece Ballroom
Dec. 11 - Kansas City, MO - Riot Room
Dec. 12 - Chicago, IL - Reggie's Rock Club
Dec. 13 - St Paul, MN - Station 4
Dec. 14 - Detroit, MI - Blondie's
Dec. 15 - Cleveland, OH - Peabody's
Dec. 16 - New York, NY - Gramercy Theater (w/ Black Anvil)

Marduk + Nachmystium = I am so there!!!

Marduk's eleventh album - Wormwood - will be released in North America on October 13. Check out the track "Phosphorous Redeemer" at the band's Myspace page.


KISS Announces North American Tour!


KISS has released dates for the North American leg of their "Alive 35" tour. KISS promises two-plus-hour sets full of the old hits we know and love as well as a sampling of tunes from their soon to be released new album, Sonic Boom.

Say what you will about whether or not KISS is still relevant. The simple fact remains that the band puts on a SHOW! They're bringing a new stage setup [as opposed to recreating one of the classic 1970s stage setups as they have been on prior tours], new costumes, and an assload of pyro! Joke all you want...you know you're gonna be there.


Sep. 25 - Detroit, MI - Cobo Arena
Sep. 26 - Detroit, MI - Cobo Arena
Sep. 28 - Cleveland, OH - Quicken Loans Arena
Sep. 29 - London, ONT - John Labatt Centre
Oct. 01 - Montreal, QC - Bell Centre
Oct. 02 - Toronto, ON - Air Canada Centre
Oct. 03 - Uncasville, CT - Mohegan Sun Arena
Oct. 05 - Boston, MA - TD Garden
Oct. 09 - Uniondale, NY - Nassau Coliseum
Oct. 10 - New York, NY - Madison Square Garden
Oct. 12 - Philadelphia, PA - Wachovia Center
Oct. 13 - Washington, DC - Verizon Center
Oct. 16 - Hampton, VA - Hampton Coliseum
Oct. 17 - Greenville, SC - Bi-Lo Center
Oct. 19 - Pensacola, FL - Civic Center
Oct. 21 - Tampa, FL - St Pete Times Forum
Oct. 22 - Sunrise, FL - Bankatlantic Center
Oct. 24 - Birmingham, AL - BJCC
Oct. 26 - Atlanta, GA - Phillips Arena
Oct. 28 - Nashville, TN - Sommet Center
Oct. 29 - Little Rock, AR - Verizon Arena
Nov. 06 - Chicago, IL - United Center
Nov. 07 - Minneapolis, MN - Target Center
Nov. 09 - Winnipeg, MB - MTS Centre
Nov. 10 - Saskatoon, SK - Credit Union Centre
Nov. 12 - Calgary, AB - Pengrowth Saddledome
Nov. 14 - Vancouver, BC - GM Place
Nov. 15 - Seattle, WA - Key Arena
Nov. 17 - Portland, OR - Rose Garden
Nov. 20 - Sacramento, CA - Arco Arena
Nov. 21 - Oakland, CA - Oakland Arena
Nov. 24 - Anaheim, CA - Honda Center
Nov. 25 - Los Angeles, CA - Staples Center
Nov. 27 - San Diego, CA - Sports Arena
Nov. 28 - Las Vegas, NV - [To Be Determined]
Dec. 01 - Glendale, AZ - jobing.com Arena
Dec. 02 - El Paso, TX - UTEP
Dec. 04 - Austin, TX - Frank Erwin Center
Dec. 05 - Houston, TX - Toyota Center
Dec. 06 - Dallas, TX - American Airlines Center

Friday, August 14, 2009

VERDICT: District 9

I saw District 9 this morning and I must say, I was completely unprepared for that movie. The first 30 minutes or so lay the groundwork/mythology of the film while concocting a pressure cooker of a scenario. You just know that at any moment very bad things are going to happen. But the film teases and ups the tension a little more. Until finally you're pretty much a passenger on an out of control roller coaster. District 9 is one of the most intense films I've seen in some time.

On the surface District 9 contains elements of films you've seen before. Little bits of Starship Troopers, The Fly[the Cronenberg version], Independence Day, The Defiant Ones, and Robocop. The main character - Wikus - reminded me of Michael Scott crossed with Borat. But Disctrict 9 rises above being a mere rip-off by taking it's [presumed] influences and using them as reference points and inspiration to create a new work of art. This is a well-made film that is thought provoking AND entertaining. The running time pushes the two hour mark though it seems about 40 minutes shorter. This is a film that will completely absorb you and have you on the edge of your seat.

Verdict: I'll be seeing this film again!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Pieces of the puzzle


Them Crooked Vultures have their first show in the can and by all accounts it seems like everyone was blown away. Over the past couple of days the band's been sending out tweets a couple of times a day with links to their store [which for now features only a $30 t-shirt] or the browser version of Google Earth [though frankly I haven't been able to get the GE thing to work as I'm having issues downloading the appropriate plug-in]. There has been an album title [Never Deserved the Future] bandied about that may or may not be the actual title. It all depends on who you ask.

Four hours ago the following photo was sent out via Twitter:


And just a few minutes ago the following Youtube clip was sent out:


That's a pretty epic 14-seconds of music right there folks! I expect a tsunami of information in the coming days. It's about to get very interesting!

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Happy! Happy!!! Joy! Joy!!!

Say hello to Doug Mathis. Why is he smiling?






Well, it could be because Doug just had a huge burden lifted from his shoulders.

Doug is a relief pitcher for the Texas Rangers. As this is his
rookie year in the major leagues he was given a unique task by his teammates in the bullpen [described in this texasrangers.com article]:

Doug Mathis -- The Rookie

Mathis may just be a rookie, but he carries some of the biggest responsibilities.

He takes two bags with him to the bullpen every day. One is a pink Dora the Explorer bag filled with protein bars, snacks and other supplies needed to pass the time in the bullpen.

If he doesn't come through, Mathis will receive his fair share of grief.

"We were out of protein bars one day," Mathis said. "C.J. [Wilson] eats protein bars every game in about the fifth inning. One day I forgot to restock it, and I got yelled at. I like to stay on top of it."


Today Mathis passed on the Dora backpack to another rookie - Neftali Feliz.


Let me take this opportunity to say "Welcome to The Show, Neftali! I hope you enjoyed your first day. It was quite a day. I hope you'll be around for a long time!"

Here's a breakdown of Feliz's first day:
  • Gets called up from the minors to take over the relief position created when Jason Grilli was placed on the Disabled List
  • From the looks of this photo [sent out by teammate C.J. Wilson via Twitter] he has inherited the Dora backpack.
  • Eric Nadel and Dave Barnett - the Rangers radio broadcasting team - gave listeners a quick tutorial on the proper pronunciation of Feliz's first name [the syllables are all evenly stressed (sort of like Ichiro's name): Nef-Tuh-Lee...not Nef-TALL-Ee]
  • The aforementioned C.J. Wilson gives Feliz a nickname in another Twitter post:
    welcoming Mr. Happy to the bullpen, and the major leagues. Got to hang a bit with him in spring training
  • Feliz is brought in to pitch in the sixth inning. He pitches two perfect innings including striking out the first four batters he faced [a fete that hasn't been achieved by a major leaguer in their first appearance sine 1962].
Not too shabby. Even though the Rangers went on to lose the game C.J. couldn't help but spotlight Feliz in one of his post-game tweets:
On a positive note the mr. Happy era has begun...feliz is fo real folks
Once again...Welcome Feliz! Please stay awhile

A Little History

It was sixteen years ago today that Robin Ventura became the only person in baseball history to get six hits off of Nolan Ryan in a single game.


Them Crooked Vultures


A few hours ago I received an email from Metro [a kick-ass music venue in Chicago] about tickets going on sale tomorrow morning for a show taking place Sunday night.

This will be the first-ever gig from a band called Them Crooked Vultures:
  • Dave Grohl - Drums
  • Josh Homme - Guitar
  • John Paul Jones - Bass
The group has been recording an album in Los Angeles and have kept a pretty tight lid on the proceedings. The interwebs have been abuzz the past couple of days as savvy surfers have been putting together the assorted pieces trying to figure out exactly what the hell this is all about.

So if you live in Chicago or happen to be there this weekend [possibly attending Lollapalooza?] you might want to try to score tix when they go on sale tomorrow morning [10am on Metro's website only]. This could likely be the top music moment of the year. Of course it could completely suck. We'll know more Monday morning.

Here's links to the obligatory websites:


Monday, August 3, 2009

Dethklok Tour Dates Announced

About a week and a half ago I posted details about Dethklok's forthcoming Dethalbum II [click here to read the entry] which made mention that the band would be hitting the road in the Fall. The tour info was released today:
  • 10/2 Portland, OR @ Roseland Theater
  • 10/3 Seattle, WA @ WaMu Theater
  • 10/4 Vancouver, BC @ Orpheum Theatre
  • 10/6 Calgary, AB @ Big Four Building
  • 10/7 Edmonton, AB @ Shaw Conference Centre
  • 10/9 Salt Lake City, UT @ Great Saltair
  • 10/10 Denver, CO @ Fillmore Auditorium
  • 10/12 Kansas City, MO @ Uptown Theater
  • 10/13 St. Louis, MO @ The Pageant
  • 10/14 Des Moines, IA @ Val Air Ballroom
  • 10/16 St. Paul, MN @ Myth
  • 10/17 Chicago, IL @ Aragon Ballroom
  • 10/18 Milwaukee, WI @ Eagle's Auditorium
  • 10/20 Columbus, OH @ LC Pavilion
  • 10/21 Detroit, MI @ The Fillmore Detroit
  • 10/23 Toronto, ON @ Sound Academy
  • 10/24 Buffalo, NY @ The Fairgrounds
  • 10/25 Albany, NY @ Armory
  • 10/27 Boston, MA @ House of Blues
  • 10/30 New York, NY @ Hammerstein Ballroom
  • 10/31 Washington, DC @ Patriot Center
  • 11/1 Philadelphia, PA @ Electric Factory
  • 11/5 Atlanta, GA @ Tabernacle
  • 11/6 Myrtle Beach, SC @ House of Blues
  • 11/7 Orlando, FL @ Hard Rock Live
  • 11/8 Pompano Beach, FL @ Pompano Beach Amphit
  • 11/11 Dallas, TX @ House of Blues
  • 11/12 Houston, TX @ Verizon Wireless Theater
  • 11/13 Austin, TX @ Austin City Music Hall
  • 11/14 Tulsa, OK @ Brady Theater
  • 11/16 Las Cruces, NM @ Pan American Center
  • 11/17 Mesa, AZ @ Mesa Amphitheater
  • 11/18 Las Vegas, NV @ House of Blues
  • 11/19 Los Angeles, CA @ Palladium
Joining Dethklok for this little jaunt around North America will be Converge, High on Fire, and - holy hell!!! - Mastodon! Fuh-reeeeeeeeeeeking MASTODON!!! This has all the makings of once solid evening of kick-ass RAWK!

Mastodon's epic Crack the Skye was released earlier this year. Dethklok's new disc - Dethalbum II - arrives September 8. Both Converge and High on Fire have new albums in the works that will likely be out in the next couple of months just in time for the start of this tour.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Dark Fortress Enters Recording Studio

From a press release posted yesterday by the band's European label:
After months of intense songwriting, German black metallers DARK FORTRESS entered V. Santura's Woodshed Studio a couple of days ago to start laying down the drum tracks for their sixth, as-yet-untitled album. The follow-up to 2008's acclaimed "Eidolon" is scheduled to be released in early 2010 via Century Media Records.

Commented
V. Santura: "The recordings are going very smooth so far and the drums sound just fantastic. Seraph is doing a really great job. This time we are aiming for a more natural and dynamic sound in order to keep all musical details, a certain raw dirt and personality that most modern productions lack of. Our upcoming album is going to be very diverse and probably the heaviest material we ever wrote."
Eidolon was one of last year's most pleasant surprises. It was dark and epic without stumbling into kitschiness. Drop by the band's Myspace page to hear tracks from Eidolon and you'll understand why I'm so psyched to hear the follow-up.

Pearl Jam Scavenger Hunt

Pearl Jam recently announced that their ninth album - Backspacer - will be released on September 20, 2009. Listen to a sample of the first single - "The Fixer" - on this widget:


The band has created an online scavenger hunt with the reward being a download of the demo version of "Speed of Sound" [another track from Backspacer that Eddie Vedder had been performing on his recent solo tour]. There are nine pieces of artwork [by Tom Tomorrow] scattered around on various websites. Click here to get started.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

We all know that The Devil wears Prada. But what happens when the Prada gets dirty? What detergent does The Devil use? 'Cause frankly I don't see The Devil as being the type of being to tolerate dry cleaners shenanigans. I now share with you THE definitive answer.

I was shopping at Targhetto today and passed an endcap with various laundry detergents that had been marked down. I stopped to check the prices as laundry detergent was specifically one of the items I needed to pick up. My heart skipped when my gaze fell upon this bottle of Ultra Tide with Bleach Alternative.



Let him who hath understanding reckon the price of The Beast's detergent. For it is in American currency.

It's price is six hundred and sixty-six cents!




Time to get a passport


I've never had a passport. I've never been out of the States. Not even to Mexico or Canada. I'd love to go overseas at some point in my life. I have a feeling that I'd enjoy spending January in Norway. Yet I've never made the first step into making overseas travel a reality: getting a passport. Well now I do feel some motivation due to the following press release from the Roadburn Festival:
Tom Gabriel Warrior Named As Curator For Roadburn 2010

Roadburn is very pleased to announce that Tom Gabriel Warrior, founder of the illustrious Hellhammer and Celtic Frost, has agreed to act as the curator for our festival on Friday, April 16th 2010, and host a special event at Roadburn, called
Only Death Is Real.

Tom's duties as curator include personally selecting the bands that will play on
Only Death Is Real, as well as to perform the first major headlining set with his latest incarnation, Triptykon. Tom will be Roadburn’s third curator, following up on David Tibet in 2008 and Neurosis earlier this year, and we would call his election a perfectly natural progression.

We are overjoyed to have secured Tom's involvement in Roadburn this year, as he stands as a truly groundbreaking artist, with his previous bands having been extremely divisive, as is often the case with truly unique and original works of art. Ultimately his canon of work would prove not only legendary but hugely inspirational for an entire generation of musicians in the metal, doom and dark psychedelic scenes.

Tom has always enjoyed pushing the envelope musically and challenging boundaries, and it was entirely that mindset that made him a perfect fit to act as our curator. It has been a constant goal of ours to keep Roadburn a festival that not only celebrates the established but charts new territory, and we could think of no better spirit guide than Tom Gabriel Warrior. We are looking forward to the new ideas that he will bring to our festival, as we feel that we are truly kindred spirits.

Tom Gabriel Warrior:
"It is a surprise and an honor to be asked by Roadburn to act as a curator, and I am accepting this extraordinary opportunity with much gratitude and due humility. In my eyes, Roadburn is one of the most courageous and artistic festivals in existence, and its history is, in essence, a list of concerts by groups I deeply admire. It is quite a challenge to follow such footsteps, both as a curator and as a musician. I will try my very best to ensure that the groups I intend to propose to the organizers of Roadburn will be as ravishingly dark, unique, and exciting to the festival's visitors as they are to me."

Holland’s very own Roadburn Festival has become Europe’s leading underground festival for psychedelic, avant-garde, doom or any other variation of leftfield sonic pleasure at pushing the boundaries of music.

In addition to the music, Roadburn has earned a reputation as having a unique camaraderie between the festivalgoers, bands, organizers and staff, and ranks as one of the best and most laid-back festivals to be experienced.

Roadburn 2010, including Tom Gabriel Warrior's
Only Death Is Real, will run for three days from Thursday, April 15 to Saturday, April 17 at the 013 venue and Midi Theatre in Tilburg, Holland. There will be an additional afterburner event on Sunday, April 18, 2010.
I suspect that when I do finally set foot on foreign soil it will be to attend one of the many excellent music festivals held throughout Europe. Now I'm not saying that I'm going to make it out to Roadburn 2010. Who knows how much airfare and accomodations will cost. But with the current status of the global economy travel is super cheap. I'd hate it if I could afford the travel costs but couldn't go because I don't have a passport. So yeah...time to fill out the application and go get my picture taken!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Dethalbum II is Coming!

Dethklok frontman Nathan Explosion made the following post on the band's Myspace page a few days ago:
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
It's finished.

THIS FALL we give you DETHALBUM II on SEPTEMBER 8th 2009!!!

A new season of HALF HOUR episodes.

the DETHGAME on XBOX 360 AND PS3 brought to you by Konami.

DETHKLOK VS THE GOON Comic book out on Dark Horse Comics (out soon sooner than fall)

AND THE DETHTOUR! (will announce line up soon).

Fuck yeah. We've been working hard for all of you!

Go die.

Wait.

Do not go die. Not just yet. Experience this fall first. And then go die.

Nathan Explosion.

The CD and Deluxe Edition CD will be followed three weeks later by a picture disc vinyl edition on September 29.

Album art:


Track listing:

1. Bloodlines
2. The Gears
3. Burn the Earth
4. Laser Canon Deth Sentence
5. Black Fire Upon Us
6. Deth Support
7. The Cyborg Slayers
8. I Tamper with the Evidence at the Murder Site of Odin
9. Murmaider II: The Water God
10. Comet Song
11. Symmetry
12. Volcano

\m/

Supersuckers at Granada Theater

The Supersuckers rolled into town Wednesday night to bring a heapin' helpin' of rock to the masses. And the masses showed up despite the fact that it was a Wednesday night. The band did not disappoint as they tore through a 90 minute set that featured a countrified mini-set in the middle of their show. The execution was far more successful than when they did the same thing in 1997 on the Must've Been High tour. The Supersuckers have been in the quarry for over 20 years now mining the rock [that's one bountiful quarry!] and show no signs of calling it quits anytime soon.

I've lost count of how many times I've seen them over the 15+ years that I've known them. I do know that they do not disappoint. I remember a show at Trees in the early 90s when they were touring for La Mano Cornuda [one of my all-time favorite albums]. Their trailer had been burgled the previous night and their spirits were low. They were ready to go home and the robbery only increased their desire to get back to Seattle. Playing instruments borrowed from their opening act [if memory serves correctly it was The Meices] they opened up the floor to cover requests. For five bucks apiece. I've never seen them do a show like that since [though they still play two or three covers each show].

Here's some photos from Wednesday night's festivities: