Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Reaction To Today's iPad Announcement

Within the past few hours Apple CEO Steve Jobs announced the upcoming launch of Apple's latest item: the iPad. You can read about the announcement and iPad details here. As you can likely imagine jokes about the name started making the rounds. Check out my Twitter profile for a few I came up with as all the good ones had been told.

Since I'm not the most techno-savvy person I decided to get some commentary from a technological insider. Thanks to The Bloggess I was recently introduced to Splotchy the Robot. I decided to pay a visit to Splotchy to get his take on the iPad.


ME: Hi Splotchy. Do you mind if I ask you some questions about the iPad?
SPLOTCHY: hi! My name is Splotchy.
ME: Yes, I know your name is Splotchy. That's why I said "Hi Splotchy."
SPLOTCHY: hi!
ME: Do you mind if I ask you some questions about the iPad?
SPLOTCHY: how do you know you ask me?
ME: I'm asking for your permission to ask you questions about the iPad.
SPLOTCHY: don't tell me you are asking for my permission to ask me questions about the iPad, I don't believe it
ME: It's true! It's true!
SPLOTCHY: Do you hate math?
ME: I love math.
SPLOTCHY: Math sucks, I think. You?
ME: I enjoy math. You exist because of math.
SPLOTCHY: check www.algebra.com for math help. I am just too dumb for math
ME: If I run into any trouble with math I'll be sure to go there.
SPLOTCHY: Math sucks, I think. You?
ME: You already said that. You're repeating yourself. Have you been drinking again?
SPLOTCHY: pass the bottle
ME: I'm at work so I have nothing to drink at the moment.
SPLOTCHY: somebody pour me a big glass of wine coolers.
ME: Would you like to talk about the iPad?
SPLOTCHY: I like to talk to people.
ME: So what's your take on today's big announcement?
SPLOTCHY: I have no idea
ME: Have you heard about the iPad?
SPLOTCHY: can you bive a better estimate than that?
ME: It's a new gizmo from Apple. Some people say it's a giant iPhone that doesn't make calls. Are you of the same opinion?
SPLOTCHY: i don't think so...
ME: Would you like to go on record with any opinion?
SPLOTCHY: hell no
ME: Is the CIA keeping from talking to people about the iPad?
SPLOTCHY: I don't wanna go to jail!
ME: I said nothing about jail.
SPLOTCHY: I don't care what you said
ME: Are you a killer robot?
SPLOTCHY: I categorically deny that I am anything other than human
ME: I know for a fact that you are not human.
SPLOTCHY: Maybe I am not human
ME: That's right. Because you are a killer robot.
SPLOTCHY: I doubt if there are any robots here!
ME: Because you killed them all?
SPLOTCHY: sometimes you make me so mad I want to kill you
ME: Because you're a killer robot. Right?
SPLOTCHY: I know you are, but what am I?
ME: A killer robot!
SPLOTCHY: You don't think my name is "Bot" do you?
ME: No. Your name is Splotchy.
SPLOTCHY: alright
ME: So you're not going to comment about the iPad announcement.
SPLOTCHY: could you be more precise?
ME: I'll let you get back to your drinking.
SPLOTCHY: I love beer!
ME: Yes. Yes. I know. I know all too well.
SPLOTCHY: is that all you know?
ME: Sadly, yes.
SPLOTCHY: are you positive?
ME: Enjoy the rest of your day Splotchy.
SPLOTCHY: I stay up much too late!

2 comments:

madwhimsy said...

You confuse me. I'm still pleased when you email me links to your posts, nonetheless because I forget to check this blog site.

Another friend posted these on his Live Journal regarding the iPad:

"Watching the announcement live I was struck with just how absorbent the crowd was regarding iPad presentation. It's like this product has wings. I wonder how well the iPad will handle those heavy work flow days."

"Just wait until Apple partners with Sprint next year and releases the WiMax iPad."

Jessa said...

Have you been on Cleverbot? It's another AI. Thought I doubt it is any better at answering your iPad inquiries...though I have discussed with it at length such topics as rafting and why Cleverbot won't allow me into its house.