Hey Rizz...Has Hellboy tried chewing on a plug of tobacco while receiving a peanut butter enema? That sounds as plausible a remedy as some of the others your listeners are recommending.I think some back story is in order.
PS: "California Man" by Cheap Trick [originally by The Move] would probably work with some cowbell.
Jeff "Hellboy" Thomas [he does the morning "Sportscenter" updates on ESPN Cleveland] is currently afflicted with a kidney stone. Various listeners have been calling in with assorted remedies ranging from drinking 72 ounces of Coca Cola and eating raw cabbage to chewing on lemons. My suggestion seemed as ridiculous as any of those. Besides, peanut butter enema is fun to say.
Rizz was given a cowbell several months back and has been playing along on-air to such cowbell classics as "Mississippi Queen" and "Working For the Weekend". I think the Cheap Trick song has good cowbell potential. I'll update if he gives it an attempt.